Freaking out

i would schedule a time to have a serious conversation, over the phone or in person and ask her specifically what she needs that seems to be lacking, and really listen and don’t try to negate her experience. you can brainstorm together ways that would make her feel loved while also finding ways to communicate your needs without her feeling suffocated. compromise a healthy relationship makes.

and i’m sorry but promises about not leaving are not healthy imo for someone with bpd, and a bit juvenile. that is something should be shown instead of told, your girlfriend cannot predict what the future will hold she can only act accordingly. in the event she does leave, your trust issues will likely get worse and your mental health will plummet.

it doesn’t really sound like you’re in therapy… it would help to work on raising your self esteem and doing things independently, being so interwoven in a relationship and feeling like you’re nothing without them is not the hallmark for a healthy connection. please try to find other things/hobbies/reasons to exist, that is a lot of weight to put on one person. ❤️

/r/BPD Thread