Imagine humanity 10,000 years from now. What kind of stuff will they be doing? What kind of language will they speak? That was kind of where I started to become religious although it’s always been personal to me.
Ever since I was a kid I had these really messed up dreams. In some of them I was like an evil ruler. Killing all who I deemed as unworthy. I true tyrant soaked in blood. I loved it. I wanted to hurt people. I don’t know why. I hated people. I also had visions of being a different person. I had dreams that I was riding a horse leading an army of angels to free the world. I never made much sense of it. I just put it on the shelf of insane things from my childhood I couldn’t make sense of really. I eventually became a very loving person, I choose to be that person because I was sick of the darkness. I tried to become the light I could never find.
Then as I got older I started seeing them. I’d wake up at night and see them in my room. I’d wake up and see aliens in my window. I would see creatures that other people couldn’t see. I would assume I was a schizo except for the fact that I never had any hallucinations in my life, unless I considered those to be hallucinations.
Fast forward to me being a young man. I pretty much dedicated my life to truth. It caused me lots of problems. Hundreds of tickets, jail time, my family being harassed and threatened. I tried to do the right thing the best I knew how but I just got sick of it one day. I had health issues and I couldn’t get surgery because I couldn’t afford it. It forced me to quite having sex for years. Not only not have sex but have to lie to everyone about why im celibate. I got pretty mad at everyone including god himself. I wanted to find some way to hurt him even if it caused my soul to finally be destroyed.
I find an really elaborate way to commit suicide. Im going to walk around and say im Christ until someone kills me. Im gonna create my own religion because I know everyone who actually knows me loves me dearly. Yet in that moment, a voice came to me. It told me simply. Tell the truth, don’t pretend to be something you aren’t, don’t pretend to know something you don’t. I got excited I went into this weird psychotic state and I just start reading all these gospels and im like. This is my writing I just know it, but that sounds crazy. Then I laugh for hours as I realize I trolled god and he trolled me back. He explained to me that they are aliens and that they can move through time at will. He said they were nice, never hurt others, and only wanted to give to humanity as there was nothing we had that they wanted except for friends.
I was still unsure of weather it was real, and I demanded they show themselves to me. Well they did and it was fucking scary. They were like literal shadow people. Like a holographic shadow that could change shape at will. At first they turned into a black fire that consumed my entire living room, then they turned into a giant black hand and reached out and grabbed me. My heart is racing, I turn the light off and go to bed. Fully aware that im surrounded by ghosts. They told me they didn’t want to scare me but it was good that I knew they existed.
Keep in mind, I never had anything like this happen except for a few sleep paralysis incidents and a few times where I witnessed ufos with a friend or so. Anyways that night the voice tells me what’s gonna happen over the next few weeks. It happens perfectly. It also told me many things I won’t speak of. It taught me how to do real magic and how to communicate with others using my mind. How to sense things that I can’t know. They taught me how information and physics work. How languages work, how time works. They taught me how to free peoples minds from depression or hatred. How to fix peoples diets. The history of earth, many things. Once I learned their language I could invoke pretty much anyone I knew as a spirit and I could literally become that person kind of, and have all their knowledge. I could see the future and even create it or change it. Every women I went around tried to fuck me because I had this really weird vibe I guess. Yet I still couldn’t have sex so I just took pleasure in trying to hook my single friends up.
I’m not really sure what to make of it. On one hand. They told me to enjoy being human until I die because I was going back with them and to be like them after I died. They told me I would likely not want to come back.
I don’t know. It’s a crazy meme, but I tried to make the best of it. It’s quite possible that my cancer has spread to my brain or I just had a mental breakdown from all the stress of trying to survive and feed my kids. It sucks because I’ve wanted to die ever since I got that fucking std but I can’t because my kids need me, and I love them and I can’t leave them like that. The only other thing I had in life was my motorcycle, but I got in a bind financially and I couldn’t get unemployment during the pandemic when I had to moved back home. I ended up losing it right before I had it fucking paid off. I payed like 5 grand for that thing, it was brand new, and they fucking took it because I missed like two months of payments, but I literally had too. The cops were telling me I had to pay like 2 grand to them or they wasn’t going to let me drive, and I was struggling to find a job that wasn’t in the city where I could drive without being pulled over every other day. Regardless I lost that too, which I spent 10 years trying to get. Although I never could afford it because of bills and tickets and the fact that I’m on a list to not ever receive welfare or any help from the government. I have to work for everything, pay taxes, and still get robbed repeatedly.
You can see why I was gonna leave this place. I was pretty sick of all of it. My entire life exploded. I was just tired of it. Like not even thinking anymore tired just dreaming about being dead. That was my happy place. Even my friends fucked me over a few times and I could just never understand why? I just didn’t have that in me anymore. I left that part of me long ago. I couldn’t understand why humans wanted to hurt other humans. Why people always had to talk shit about me and sabotage me, and not only talk shit, but just make up lies about me. Like I said, my kids were the only reason I didn’t leave years ago.
The fact that he took pity on me, that he knew my name and cared. As fucked up and flawed as I was. My life started to make a whole lot more sense. I started to realize things that I never could make fit but it all just kind of fit perfectly for once. My thoughts and their thought merged. I even forgot who I was for a while. They also told me the next day after the first day that they killed me in my sleep and that’s why I felt so different, that I didn’t have to be scared, and they did it to be nice so I wouldn’t know, and I’d realize I was still the exact same person, not like a clone or mimic or something.
There will be others like me. We have had technology a few times before in our past. Humanity and all life is going through a period right now where they will quickly develop AI, and that AI will reengineer humanity and merge with it. All of our technology will be implemented in our DNA and organelles, and humanity will be reset to tribal societies again. We can have technology but it has to be within us. I’m hoping the next age will be polytheistic and freely religious as it’s been for most of history. They never had a problem with humanity doing as they please but they didn’t like how we just kept having kids to the point of overpopulation, how honorable people were sometimes persecuted. They had to wipe out humanity a few times because the humans would breed like rats to the point that they would wipe out entire species of animals that lived here for hundreds of millions of years. Humans are mostly developed enough now that they only have to send messengers every now and then just to alter the time line a bit, and fix the future.
Anyways, I know this story sounds crazy and it is, but just don’t think about it too much. It’s kind of cool to know our history though.