Is this a thing? Oh I didn't know! How nice!

Here here, I wanna grab the microphone, heat your seats!

Have you ever wondered you were born in a way you don't feel like you belong to? No, I am not touching the "gender" thing, something more socio-political...

Nationalism. Yeah that is. I hate my country. I was born here yet I have never fitted in the traditions, nor the culture, nor the people, it was just a big no since I have memory. I just accepted being different and took my own way. That's until I met the so-famous United States of America, known by the first letters, the U.S.A or how my "comrades" call it, "the capitalist empire full of fat pigs".

Disclaimer here, I do not agree with the previous statement at all. I visited the U.S and fell in love. Visited Florida, of course y'all northamericans will say "Oh but you didn't visit the best of us!". I also took a trip to North Carolina and California. How the things move in the U.S was so weird, everybody looks happy! I accidentally rolled over a security staff with my luggage in Atlanta's airport, I said the only words I knew in the English language: "I am sorry!". The officer responded with a smirk "No problem boss!" according to my father who spoke English.

I fell in love with the american citizens, they are not pigs, they are not devils, they share the same thoughts as me, I definitely fit in their society! I said. Ever since then I was focused on learning the English language and leaving for the U.S to finally "fit". I feel like I was born in the wrong place, where walking in the wrong place with a U.S flag on your shit would get you shot, I hated this place.

1, 2, 3 years went by and I was determined. I taught myself english, hoping one day I would be able to hold an english conversation with my father, live up to my expectations. My father was doing the paperwork to leave for the U.S. My happiness and future were just around the corner. My mother didn't want to leave, they discussed, and oh boy do I remember as a naive 11 years-old boy seeing my parents close their doors and yell at each other in the kitchen. It was a normal routine, after all, they had divorced and were now concubines.

Time flew by and my father was quickly diagnosed with cancer of the everything. In a state of emergency he left alone to the U.S to seek for a cure, I was very religious and I knew he was going to be cured! My mother didn't want me to leave because I had just entered highschool and didn't want to be distracted away from my studies.

My father fought for a couple of weeks in the U.S until he drew a last breath. God wrote me letters I decided to ignore. The last day I saw my father's bloody eyes in my home country.

I'm sorry I can't finish this. I am going to TL DR and continue this in a personal note.

TL;DR: Never fitted in my country. Wanted to leave for the U.S, planned doing so with my father. He dies, I finished my English studies alone, never really got an opportunity to meet my goals.