i understand what you mean because i feel the same about men being able to take care of themselves, but we’re very traditional and there is an agreement between his parents for many years: his dad works and pays the bills and his mom is supposed to hold up her end with taking care of the house. i believe and even his parents believe there should be a division of responsibility in a relationship, it’s just she won’t do it for whatever reason.

since our respective families are immigrants it’s really taboo for her to not take care of her family in their situation, so maybe we do have a bit of a different way of thinking. i do agree both my bf and his dad should take care of themselves, he bf tries but his parents always take from him. for example, he will buy groceries to make a salad, the lettuce will be gone by the time he gets home from work the next day because his parents used it.

the situation makes me frustrated and has been a giant issue for him since he was a child and it breaks my heart to know she’s never actually taken care of him or his sister