I used to think the same way too! Just eventually, me and my friends founded and put together a really tight friend group from real life and some online that just enjoy messing with each other and just being in each other's presence. It just can get to the point where being embarrassed from some mistakes in video games can get unhealthy and it just really isn't a great situation to find yourself in. You're better off finding a group of people that you can have fun with, improve with and most importantly, learn the game with because in the end, you're still not going to enjoy the game. If you have people, random or people you know, that won't get off your back just because you choked a clutch or made a dumb mistake, then you're not going to enjoy yourself under most circumstances