Maybe I can give some perspective from the daughters end, but from a positive experience. I know OP deleted her account but whatever. My father passed away when I was 14. My mom didn’t start dating until a few years later when I was either a junior or senior in high school. Everything was on my terms. If I didn’t like him I knew she would have broken up. He was a super sweet guy, and expected nothing from me. Never expected a Gift for Father’s Day or a birthday present, or even the time of Day from me.

He is the best thing that’s happened to my mom since my dad passed. I have a great relationship with him, and he asked for my “permission” to marry my mom. Next Summer she will be taking his last Name (I think) and I can’t be happier for her.

What’s my point? OP has too many expectations from her stepdaughters. That is what destroyed their relationship. What a Bitter Woman.