I felt this with my third son. It was husbands and mine second child together and I thought our last (currently 34 weeks with much loved surprise baby!) so of course I wanted to experience raising a girl. I even got teary eyed when they told us it was a boy. I’m usually very gender neutral and not overly focused on girl vs boy things so I was very shocked at my response.

That little guy is currently cuddling next to me and was just crying earlier because his older brothers went to bed and he couldn’t go with them. He loves his brothers so much, I didn’t realize that a two year old could form bonds with siblings quite like this. He has a 12 year old brother that is his piggyback giving, cookie sneaking, tickle monster. He even runs to him when he’s hurt. His 5 year old brother is his best friend. My 5 year old and him are literally inseparable during the day. They are constantly getting into things together and I catch them hiding together giggling and cuddling all the time. They are bonded in ways I wish I could be with my siblings. I’m so greatful that they have each other now that it seems very, very distant and almost surreal that I ever felt any disappointment.

That being said, take your time to feel it and know that a lot of us have felt the disappointment and guilt and all the mixed emotions that come with gender disappointment. Hang in there! Your little guys will be loving on each other and rough housing around soon and you won’t be able to imagine life any different! It took a while for me to pass by the little girl section and not longing look at the cute little dresses, but soon passed.

This surprise baby is my girl but after experiencing that disappointment with our third I can honestly say I wouldn’t have felt the same emotions if this was our fourth boy. That’s how amazing it is too see my boys together! Now I’m worried about only having one girl haha!