George receives divorce papers in the mail from someone who stole his Identity to commit tax fraud by pretending to be married to him. Jerry's new girlfriend has the same laugh as his mom. Elaine clashes with the new hire Enaile Seneb. Kramer Takes a bet he can't not talk for an entire week.

(George and Jerry sit at their usual diner booth) George: I don't know, Jerry. I don't know. Jerry: (sighing) You don't know what, George? George: (staring at divorce papers) I don't know if I should let her go. Maybe we could make it work. Jerry: (rolling his eyes) For crying out loud, George. (Enter Elaine) Elaine: Whoo, what a day. What's new? Jerry: George wants to save his marriage. (Elaine stares at George and starts laughing) Elaine: You don't even know her! She doesn't even know you! George: Exactly! I've never been able to make it work with any woman who knows me, so ... maybe she's the one? (Jerry and Elaine look at each other) Jerry: ... you do have a point. (Kramer enters, holding up his phone) Kramer: Woo boy, Georgie, you're a looker! George: What? I mean, I am ... Kramer: (holding out the phone to Elaine and Jerry) Take a look! That's George Costanza. George: I've always had really nice hands, anyway ... Elaine: (perking up) Whoa, mama! Jerry: Is that a Porsche? George: What? Let me see! Elaine: It's like Jon Hamm and Antonio Banderas had a love child! Kramer: I might even hit that. George: (grabbing the phone) How did he afford a Porsche? With my identity, that's how! He stole my identity, stole my girl, then abandoned her like a piece of trash! That thieving, two-timing, ridiculously handsome creep! Elaine: I agree with the ridiculously handsome part. Jerry: Same. Kramer: The Handsome needle is definitely in the Ridiculous range. George: (leaping up) That's it! I'm suing! I'm taking Fake Handsome George Costanza to court and I'm getting my Porsche and my wife back! Excuse me while I call Gretchen. Elaine: Who's Gretchen? George: My wife! Her contact information is on the divorce papers. Jerry: Pretty sure that's contact information for her lawyer, George. George: It's a start, Jerry! Stop crushing my dreams! A man has to have dreams, Jerry! Kramer: If you talk to Handsome George, tell him we say hello! Elaine: Definitely! Tell him I say ... (in a sultry voice) hello.

/r/RedditWritesSeinfeld Thread