GF (20) has pain during sex,thinks our relationship is boring and want´s to seduce again - after not having sex with me (M21) for 1.5 years

I have not had intercourse for 20+ years due to my wife having pain. Things got boring but we loved each other and there was still oral which we both liked. My wife got a vibrator and had very good orgasms with it as I played with her. So we managed but I needed more and she felt guilty for not being able to have intercourse with me.

My wife had a brilliant but unorthodox solution. She brought her BFF into our sex life. I had someone I could have intercourse with and my wife had someone she did not have to feel guilty about withholding intercourse with. She could have sex with me and her girlfriend with her BFF giving me what my wife could not. She had sex with her BFF without the stress and guilt of not having intercourse. We went on like this for 30 years and our sex life was great. Both girls were also open to trying sexual fetishes at least once and when my wife did not like a fetish, her girlfriend did and vice versa. We were kinky as heck both in our own bed and in many other places both private and public.

We have always found different things to do to jump start a sex life. Even prior to my marriage my ex girlfriends and I would have foursomes, gang bangs and even orgies to allow us to have sex with others individually or as a couple. My wife and I did a wife swap and a few foursomes. We often soft swapped where you do foreplay with others but save the main event for your partner. As a guy, nothing makes you want sex with a girl than when you know she just had sex with someone else. Sperm competition is the reason and dates back to early man when there was never an equal amount of men and women so men shared women and those best able to displace another man’s sperm with theirs got to carry on their genetic line.

Basically sit down and figure out what you both like in common. If she does not love you, don’t waste time on her. I went through an ex fiancé and ex live in girlfriend to get to my wife of 46 years. The best thing that ever happened to me was leaving former lovers as they both ended up with mental and drug problems leading to very bad lives. So figure it out or get out while you can. Never want someone bad for you as it can ruin your life.

/r/relationship_advice Thread