I'm so sorry, I went through the same crap - oh you need to apply yourself more/you're just lazy/not trying hard enough - I struggle with focusing at times, I freeze on mathmatics (so much tutoring in math that did absolute shit to help, even as an adult to try to pass the exams to start working on a teaching degree, failed over and over again, hated my stupid broken brain over and over again), I know I have anxiety now, I know I've had depression before. Years down the line my son needs to be screened for autism and the first thing out of her goddamn mouth is - 'Oh, well could it be ADD? Because you had ADD.'

Had. Fucking had? That shit doesn't just solve itself if you ignore it, mom. You know, just like how the rest of me was a mess of self hatred and overcritical thinking and destructive internalizing that's slowly sorting itself out because I never got therapy for all those years of sexual abuse from dad? Nope, just easier to ignore it and go - look at all you achieved! ...but you can still do better.

Fuck that. I'm a functioning adult, a preschool teacher, I'm going to make sure my kid gets help and I'm always going to look at my mom like she's the world class fuck-up. Wishing you the absolute best on muddling through the shit-show, dude!