If anyone wants to take the time to make an IASIP magic deck, I'd gladly pay money for it. Here are some card ideas:

Dayman/Nightman (working in conjunction as we saw courtesy of /u/Jin_Gitaxias)

The Troll (Hint, his ability involves some sort of toll, hole and soul)

Sweet Dee - Summon God Damned Bitch

Mac - Spawns three 0/1 Air Karate attacking creatures

Dennis - Tap 2 to sequester a card out at sea until controlling player understands the implication

Frank - Comes into play tapped. Sacrifice one land to escape couch and untap, does 2 damage to each creature and player on exiting the couch

Roxy - Special move: Tighter than dickskin - Constrict target creature in paralyzing dick-skin wrap, that creature can not attack nor defend this turn

Rickety Cricket - Sacrifice Rickety Cricket, target opponent must eat an entire lemon or take 3 damage from scurvy

Country Mac - 3/4 Summon Badass, tap to destroy target Science Bitch

Waitress - 1/2 Summon Waitress, immune to damage from Summon Rats/Rat Kings. Tap 6 colourless mana to invoke restraining order on any target player, preventing that player from attacking for 1 turn

Artemis - Summon Troubadour, comes into play with two tramp counter. Remove one tramp counter to gain control of target creature for 1 turn.

Gail the Snail - 1/4 Summon Snail, tap 2 blue mana to salivate on target creature or player for 1 point of damage. If any card with the word "Salt" is played at any time, bury Gail the Snail. "Of course, no one likes salting the snail but she gives you no choice"

Uncle Jack - Summon Lawyer; tap 3 mana and Uncle Jack, place your hands on target opponents hands. Whomever becomes uncomfortable enough to remove their hands first must discard 2 cards from their hand.

Maureen Ponderosa - 0/1 Summon Ponderosa - Tap 1 and sacrifice any Ponderosa to convert Maureen Ponderosa into Dead Tooth, a 4/5 Summon Smelly Tooth with trample