Women whose significant others tell or ask them to lose weight tend to gain more weight. OP must be like water. My GF put on a few KG when she had our baby and thought she'd automatically lose it from breastfeeding, but this assumption backfired since she mentally allowed herself to eat as much cake as she wanted. Before we found out about the pregnancy our lifestyle was generally hedonistic anyway and she was always naturally slim when she was younger so she ate a lot of fried chicken during hang-overs and took pleasure in not giving a fuck about her diet or weight. It always concentrates in her ass and not in her gut and we're both tall, she's about 6 foot, so even though she'd gotten a bit heavier over the past few years it didn't look like anything major but after the pregnancy and without much major weight loss things were a little bit different. I made sure I never said anything and just worked out and tried to eat right which still pissed her off because she wanted somebody to enjoy her cake and donuts with but I figured eventually she'd decide she'd had enough. I figure not matter how much she ridiculed me for having a shitty body image or claimed herself to not care about that kind of thing and to have contempt for whiny little bitches who count calories and do cardio all the time, she actually did care somewhere deep down and wanted to have a healthier lifestyle and set a good example for our son, something she never had growing up. We've already stopped smoking and drinking and we used to be complete instant gratification monkeys, although I was a little fitter and more prone to bouts of attempted discipline or focus, and I figured all I had to do was give her some time. Now we're both intermittent fasting and finding fun ways to exercise. I do a lot more than her because she's asthmatic but yesterday we played some tennis, broke a sweat and got out of breath but actually enjoyed it. I figured I had to just support her and cook healthy meals when it was my turn and not make her feel bad about her weight and let her decide for herself. You can try and change somebody else but I don't think it's likely to work.