Hey dude! Admittedly I am no man. But I'll share my 2 cents about this as someone who knows (at least a version) of what you're talking about.

People are saying that confidence is built. But how do you do that? First of all, and you seem to already know this, but confidence isn't always being self-assured and thinking you are the best. It's about having a core set of values, believing in yourself, and believing you are worth the best you can make for yourself.

For me, finding confidence was about believing I was worth my best self and recognizing that I not only have every right to but have a duty to live a good life and respect myself. In order to respect yourself and believe in your worth, you might need to grow and sift through the skeletons in your closet or whatever baggage is weighing you down. When I went through my "depression"(like) period, I analyzed and examined why I felt certain ways. What notions about myself, or others, or maybe even life did I build that lead to my current state of being? Once I recognized them (and it's a continuous process for sure), I worked on actively letting go of them while retaining what I felt was most important to my core values.

Work on bettering yourself not just in terms of accomplishments, but in terms of your mental state of being. This includes being kind to yourself (and in turn others; after all, it's difficult to truly be kind to others if you treat yourself like shit), believing that you can experience happiness regularly, believing that you are worth a meaningful and ambitious life, and believing that when times get tough, you are worth it and can move on.

Though you'll always have some strong core values which ground your individuality, never forget that you are a creation and are constantly creating yourself. Don't put limitations on yourself by your notions of who you are. No one is tied to a certain way of thinking or mindset. You have the freedom to create your worldview and state of being.

Much of this may sound cheesy and scattered (apologies for the cluttered writing), but I guess even if it makes little sense- trust that you can and will move on. I have felt that hopelessness you're describing, and many others have too. You are absolutely not alone. Know that it is not only possible but inevitable that you will move forward and emerge stronger.

Remember this: You don't have a lot of time in this world. Life is unimaginably short, and there's not enough time to give a fuck. So whatever fucks you're holding onto, release them and just give your well being and potential awesomeness a chance.

Peace.