Gym Story Saturday

How you know you’ve been accepted and “made it” at the hardcore Meathead Gym full of PowerLifters and BodyBuilders I go to:

1 You’re on the Squat rack and a regular just tosses his bag beside yours and starts stretching. When you complete your set, you go on one side, he goes on the other and you ask what he needs loaded.

He does the same after he finishes his set. Another regular may also work in without having to ask. You do the same thing if you arrive later. Also applies to Deadlift platform and all bodyweight stations.

2 Tiny Fierce as All Hell Ponytail Girl asks you to help her load or unload the Trap (Hex) Bar with 45s so she can get completely fucking ill.

This may or may not result in a farmers walk race to rack the 45s across the gym. She’s quick as fuck, even though the two 45s she’s hauling are almost equivalent to her body weight.

3 Your lift partner moves away and people come up to offer their condolences.

4 Regular makes eye contact with you, shakes their head slowly, then points to the guy not bringing the bar down to touch his chest on bench. The same with the quarter reppers on squat.

5 You fail on a PR. As you’re getting up multiple people mention how “you’re so fucking close”, “next week that’s yours”, “I got you if you want to rest for a few minutes and try again”, “you will get that next time, no doubt”, “you’ll laugh when you’re busting out reps of 3 with that in six months”

6 If you run out of or forget your chalk, you can just walk up and point to someone’s chalk and they’ll nod yes. You leave your chalk out in the open where it can be easily accessed.

7 You get asked about the dip belt, weight belt, clamps, chalk ball, etc… you bring with you. A few days later you see that person with the exact same item, but in a different color.

8 Someone’s going for a new PR and beforehand they come up to let you know in a Mad Max: Fury Road “Witness Me” kind of way.

You actually get pretty hyped up about it and wind up stopping to watch then screaming encouragements the whole time. Fist bump and possible Bro Hug before returning to your work out.

9 Bad ass blonde squat chick shoves you while you’re waiting in line at the water fountain, then gives you a mean look before bursting out laughing. She also does this if she comes across you staring off into space in between sets.

10 You were out sick or on vacation and when you get back, everyone is relieved to see you. You get asked several times your first couple workouts back what happened?, where were you?, are you alright?, did you get injured?

11 The regulars call you by the things you’re good at when they can’t remember your name. ‘BenchBro, give me spot’, ‘SquatMaster, you got here late today’, ‘Mr. Pull Ups, let me get that EZ curl bar on the floor behind you’, ‘Lady Lunges, using those clamps?”etc..

12 You pull out your phone to watch a video on Youtube of something new you want to try. A small crowd gathers to watch the video with you. Usually one of them will have knowledge of what you’re trying to do and offer to help.

13 You get up to get a drink or grab some more weights and someone tries to poach your station. One of the regulars puts a stop to it, “Hey, someone’s using that.” Bonus points if he or she refers to you as “my friend” or “my bro”.

You do the same when you see some douchebag trying to swipe equipment.

14 I ask you for a spot on bench Press and don’t have to spend 5 minutes explaining to you not to touch the bar unless I say “Grab it”. You already know to take a couple of steps back. And don’t even consider putting your fucking fingers under the bar while I’m benching because you know the entire gym will lose their shit.

15 You arrive at the gym or walk up to a workstation and hear “This is the guy I was telling you about”. Then wind up demonstrating something you do well or being introduced to someone becoming a regular.

16 When it’s super crowded, Hotty hot holy fuck she is fine brunette crowds into your work space to get away from the casuals staring at her or repeatedly interrupting her to try and talk to her. She mouths “Sorry” and makes sure not to hit you with her dumbbells.

If she makes a cringe face and motions towards someone who won’t leave her alone, you make eye contact with him and maintain it. You stare him down until he goes away.

17 Over Achiever Front Desk Girl lets you know when your brand of Protein Powder and/or Pre Workout is on sale as you check in or leave.

Bonus points if she updates you on her latest Gym PR or Work Project.

18 Someone runs out of chalk, forgets their belt, can’t find clamps etc… You see it and drop off yours without them even having to ask. Let them know where you’ll be and they’ll bring it when they’re done. Or if you’re leaving soon, grab it on the way out.

19 As you’re walking out to your car you exchange “good job”, “you killed it”, “murdered those squats”, “great work”, “see you tomorrow”, etc.. with others leaving.

/r/Fitness Thread