HELP. Difficult stepchild with behavior issues and mental problems.

I would post this on a subreddit related to his disorder and seek advice from there as well. If you use the search bar, you may be able to find some similar problems (with resolutions).

Since he's diagnosed with his disorder, does he see a therapist? If he doesn't have psych help, I'd highly reccomend it. Disorders get worse as one ages, especially when untreated. The schools offer free counslers and social workers, he should at least be meeting with those if you cannot find a good therapist (or if there's any other reason). I'm not sure if their schools offer this, but many offer after school programs (which is basically where the children stay after and have a guardian watch over them). Since he has little conscience, the police approach seems like it should help. When conscience is lacked, empathy typically is as well. Rather taking an emotional route, when he does something he shouldn't do, explain the physical consequences society will have on his behavior - if repeated (or when he's not with you guys for example). Also, try to make them not think about how their consequence effects him. Have him know how a victim's life would change.

However, there is certain situations, this being one of those, where parents can do anything, but they still can't "cure" their children. There's mental health professionals for a reason, they're better trained on these topics and can assist him. I applaud your family for being patient and trying, but I strongly advise that you look into a bit more of an exstensive therapy option. If for whatever reason, you guys can't do so, there's so many free resources online like massive PDF workbooks (and just general knowledge info) you could work with him on. However, I think seeing someone would work the best.

I watched this docucmentry about something of the sorts a few months ago. It seems pretty fitting for this post, I'm not sure how helpful it is but maybe take a look ?

Your wife and you are great parents, I wish your sons safety and good health. I hope things can work themselves out, best of wishes x

/r/Parenting Thread