Do you have other pets? - yes 2 cats
How much shedding, barking, farting and drooling can you tolerate? - well I tolerate my wife, so... as little as possible
What size of dog are you looking for? - small to medium
How much grooming do you want to do, or how often can you pay a professional to groom him? - happy to bathe and brush, happy to take it to a groomer.
What's your activity level? How much time a day can you give to walking and playing with the dog? - let's say morning and evening although in reality they'll be the occasional day opportunity too
How often will the dog be left alone? If needed, could you hire someone to walk your dog when you can't be home, pay for a doggy daycare, or come home at lunch to break up the day for him? - won't be alone that often but could be occasionally. happy to pay a dog walker if needs be but the big plus is that I generally work from home.
How trainable does your dog need to be? - well, as trainable as possible I guess!
Do you live in an apartment? Are there breed or size restrictions? - I do and no.
Do you have a fenced yard, or is there a large fenced area nearby? - yes
Do you have young (i.e under ~8) children? - no and no immediate plans
Are you experienced with owning/training dogs? - I'm not, my wife has had 2 in her life
Are you easily frustrated or stressed? - not hugely
Where do you intend to keep your dog? - in the house?
What's the weather like where you live? - well it's England so cold in winter, warm in summer, somewhere inbetween during spring and autumn
Have you budgeted for your new dog? - yes
What are you looking to get out of your dog? (i.e a running buddy, a lap warmer/companion, guard dog. - just to be part of the family