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The Religion of Atheism: A Legal Fiction

One of the most common and hilariously ignorant arguments made against atheism is that it is a religion, and that therefore atheism is on the same ground as other religions such as Christianity or Islam. While it is reassuring to an atheist to hear their opponents admit that being religious is something insulting enough to be used against them as an argument, this is nonetheless an argument that can't be applied to atheism. To properly understand atheism and its relationship to religions, it is necessary to first understand the definitions of these words. Furthermore, due to the rampant bigotry of majority opinion, it will be necessary to take a brief side-trip into civil rights, and the concept of a legal fiction.

What is atheism? Why, godlessness of course. The strong and confident belief that with one hundred percent certainty there absolutely is not a god of any kind, that evolution is true, that nothing has any meaning, and all the other lies that Rupert Murdoch had FOX News projectile fecal vomit into the heads of the gullible masses. The rhetoric has even moved beyond the level of the bible belt high school and into certain colleges. But is it true?

No, this is a straw man, a deliberate and dishonest one. Atheism is, and only is, the lack of belief in gods. It is not a claim to certainty that no gods exist - though some atheists do also claim that. It is not a claim to believe in evolution - though all scientifically literate people do that. It is not a claim of nihilism either. Theists have a belief that at least one god exists. And atheists are just those who don't believe them at their evidence-free say-so, and remain unconvinced.

So what is a religion? A religion has tenets, unlike atheism. A religion has required and mandated standards and practices, unlike atheism. A religion typically worships an impossible mythological figure contraindicated by all laws of physics and historical records, unlike atheism. And a religion requires its members to believe false things on faith, without or despite the evidence. Atheism is not in any sense a religion, by the definition of religion.

So why then does it get treated like a religion sometimes? It's time to review the concept of a legal fiction. There are some sticking points in the laws of the nation where certain edge cases do not properly fit the existing body of law. One type of legal fiction is corporate personhood. Corporations are not people. But they have a need to own property, make contracts, and most importantly be sued for wrongdoing. This would not be possible if corporations were not people. And indeed, they aren't actually people. Thus, the legal fiction. Despite acknowledging that corporations are not people, the courts rule that for the purposes of a certain set of legalities, they will count fictitiously as one. Atheism is not a religion, but special protections are afforded to members of a religion based on the First Amendment, and it was not the intent of the law to create a group that it was considered fair and appropriate to demonize and torment. All people are intended to have freedom from and of religion, in our secular democratic republic.

So, why is atheism a religion? Atheism is a religion because the majority of Americans who are Christians are prohibited from inflicting their religion onto others who do not share the flaws of Christianity and do not wish to. Atheism is a religion because all humans deserve to be free of the oppression that Christians pretend is happening to them. Atheism is a religion, in and only in the sense of a legal fiction, because atheism isn't actually a religion any other way, and so those rights weren't granted by default.

/r/atheism Thread