Know so many people who, after getting jobs in a kitchen, being prep guys, kitchen hands etc fell in love with it and didnt see themselves doing anything else anymore. Just the vibes and environment at first pull you in. I also was that kid.

I kind of fell into it out of necessity, even though i have been basically cooking since i was 4. I was young, parents divorced, both of them left to start a new life, so basically abandoned, picked up and raised by great-grandparent(s), who already were 85 at the time.

We werent off good financially and working in a kitchen was one of the first normal paying jobs i could get. I started when i was 14 and still going to school, loved it, really did.

Until it just ate me up. Working at the top, doing 250h a month minimum just kills everything. I basically held that number up for 8 years just to get by.

Now i dont want to do it anymore, i have no energy left. Yet i mentally just cant work at a mediocre place, that pays more and expects 160hours a month, just because they do things wrong, they have no understanding of hygiene, everything overall is dirty and in a mess.

I have tried to work in hotels, but for me everything is too much systemised(routine), a shitload of bureaucracy and people are in their comfort zone.

For a few years i have been in a point where i just don't know what to do anymore. Just trying to figure out what job would actually fit me, that i would like and would kill me.