Highly sensitive. Enjoy lots of quiet time. Afraid of settling down. But also afraid of not having a family. Thoughts?

That's not how I read your original post and my apologies for that.

So if I understand you correctly, are you asking for help figuring out if you will be in the right place to become a parent 3 to 4 years from now? Ok, so let's start from the basics:

Do you want kids? Assuming you did have that million dollars saved up and you did have time for your creative pursuits, do you want to be a parent?

Assuming the answer to #1 is yes, what's a realistic timeline for you to see if your creative pursuits will bear fruit or not? Is it 3 years? What happens at the end of 3 years if you are not successful? Will you be able to give these pursuits up then? What would be different from now?

Is your partner willing to wait 3 years? Is she willing to accept uncertainty? Because it doesn't sound like you're in a place in your life where you could guarantee her that, if things don't work out for you creatively in 3 years, you'll change course and have kids with her.

Also, how different do you think life as a parent will be from your current life? What do you think life will be like if you pursue the creative work while she's the high earner and you have kids?

/r/Fencesitter Thread Parent