I go to regular therapy for this. Found that yes, due to my upbringing (in a county where women are oppressed and take on a more submissive role) I do unfortunately have a blueprint when it comes to men that I am attracted to. This is also partly why we tend to find ourselves in the same cycle even if the men themselves seem completely different in the beginning.

I am aware of this and at peace with the fact that if this relationship doesnt work out, I am better off going solo in life. I am more than capable, I have a very good job with good income, I own rental properties and my budget is solid. What happens though, as my therapist has pointed out and now I notice is that when I am in a relationship with someone, I tend to put everyone else first. I come last. (Hard to erase what you see growing up) Happened in my marriage. Now it seems like I am doing that again but not really.

I am choosing not to let his lack of a sex drive break me. Sexuality is a PART of me it isnt my entire being. Plus if I'm not going to be with anyone else due to the personalities I tend to be attracted to, might as well get used to being celibate now.