Like I mentioned in the post, I'm not proud of doing those things but I would like to understand - during the other times when I considered breaking up with her, what was I manipulating her for?

I was considering dumping her because I felt like she was immature and that I was getting tired of taking care of adult things like fixing accounts in collections, saving for emergencies, learning how to cook an egg. What would I get out of manipulating her? Having her start to pull her own weight? Getting her to learn how to be more of an adult and handle these responsibilities without me having to intervene? I just feel like you were pretty quick to point the finger there and reading your response just seemed like you were coming at me very hot.