Dylan standing infront of a WiR backdrop, with sunglasses on

Dylan: Jesus fucking tits, how the hell didn't anyone see that coming? I mean god fucking damn I'm a heel in SCW!!! Anyway, I'm facing a god damn Sloth!!! Is it a fucking mexican in a sloth suit? Is it an actually sloth? If it is, that's fucking animal abuse!!! But once I beat that piece of jungle gym monkey ass, I'll put him in my truck and fucking take him back to the vet!!! I'm not too concerned about this match since he's a fucking jobber, i don't even know why I'm doing a promo, When I'm going to win anyway.

Dylan takes out a cigarette and smokes it

Dylan: Once I go through Sloth, I don't care who wants a piece of me, but by the end of the month, I want a independent title shot!!! Sparky you better watch your drug dealing ass, I'm coming for you and everyone on the WiR roster, NO EVERY WRESTLER ON THIS PLANET EARTH!!!!! This interview is over. TYE DYE BAYBAY!!!!!!!!

FADE TO BLACK