How do you deal with the fact that you'll always have OCD?

One day I was getting a vaccination so I could travel overseas, and I freaked out about the needle going into my vein. The nurse sent me to an institution because she thought I had 'anxiety'.

I got to the place and they did a whole lot of surveying/testing. I was diagnosed with OCD, anorexia, and anxiety. Lol. Now, I'm a clean person. Very clean - in fact, I will admit to having participated in ritualistic behaviour at times too, with some times being worse than others. But fuck, I was scared when they said it. They dosed me up with this medication and monitored my weight.

For over a year I was thinking 'what the fuck is wrong with me! I have these mental illnesses!' I think I used the label as an excuse in the end, to make the humanistic urge to overreact somewhat permissible. (It's not. It's annoying.) Anyhow, after so long I came to the conclusion that I wasn't as fucked as I had thought I was. Not in the way that medicine might fix. I just needed a bit of self control. Much, much more of which after my stupid stint with the psychologists.

I didn't believe I had an anxiety disorder, and certainly not anorexia nervosa. My panic attacks were symptoms of the diagnosis, rather than of my own ailment. I am mortified.

I weened myself off of the medication, and got pissed at the fact I was forced to gain five kgs by doctors who probably get off on diagnosing crying children, ones that don't know what to do when their parents take their phones off them, with PTSD.

I thought how my proposed OCD had certainly always flared up under the premise that the logical part of my brain was partly disabled. E.g. I had it very badly as a kid. Badly with marijuana. Badly with stress. But aside from that I knew I could teach myself to cope. After being formally diagnosed it just became kinda kitsch. No environment for learning self control.

Don't be so foolish to think that you're stuck with OCD for life. It isn't dramatic at all to start using the logical part of your brain. You can hear it saying 'stop being retarded' through all the curses and obsessions, and you can make use of that.

Don't let doctors or titles or forums like this one perpetuate the illness. Don't let yourself be over-diagnosed.

/r/OCD Thread