Try to ask questions, tell him to explain what he's saying, try not to take it personally and you both need to act like adults.

"He said all I do is argue" - what do you mean? How I argue? Do you argue? It takes two to argue..

"He also say I’m ungrateful" - Why do you think that I'm ungrateful? Do you really think that I don't appreciate what you do?

Now, you are not doing yourself a favor:

"I just stay locked up in my room mostly" - he's your dad and not a roommate, you need to socialize with your stepmom or other people that are living in the house.

"So I got up calmly and left the room" - that is passive agressive. If he's talking to you don't leave or try to stonewalling him, it's not productive. Learn how to say NO, NO I'm not going. (Period). Imagine if you asked him to live with him and he "got up calmly and left the room". How would you feel?

"and they know you blow up" - You need to learn self control, that's on you, you are not 5 yo.

Also, don't be delusional and entitled (don't know if it's the case but...):

"I’m not lost in life. I know exactly what I want and I have a very clear plan" - what is your plan? Are you paying them? Are you just using him until you save enough money to move or until you finish school?

"I refuse to live that way. I don’t really have a choice right now." - good, behave if you don't have choice! He's not a great father but he's doing you a HUGE favor! I wouldn't let 33 yo live with me, be at the room all the time, yell at me and give me a silent treatment!