How does personal stress affect communication in your LDR?

My fiance is currently in the process of interviewing for his own job, due to layoffs at his company. My own work situation is a nightmare. At the same time, we're planning an international wedding. There is a lot of stress. We're both the type of people who need to work these things out on our own, and we had to acknowledge this explicitly to one another. We've only had a few messages here and there since last Thursday, and are making an effort to Skype tonight to reconnect. It's important for us to acknowledge our stress to one another but not to disconnect completely. We have phrases that are meaningful to us... "I'm here for you" is one. When I tell him "I'm here for you", it means I will try my best to be available if he needs to talk, and if not, then I'm thinking about him. It's a promise that while things are bad, we're still together, and still a team. We need to know the other is still there, even if we are dealing with things mostly separately.

It's one thing to take time to oneself in order to fix things in our lives, but it's another to completely sever our connection with one another. A strong couple doesn't disconnect, they simply "pause". It also requires understanding the other person's needs and respecting them. When my partner says "I need to deal with this in this way", I take him seriously, because he doesn't often ask for anything. I'll occasionally send messages telling him that I'm on his side and that I love him. We have a very strong partnership based on mutual respect, which sometimes takes emotional strength (like when I'm missing him but I need to give him some space), but I wouldn't have it any other way. When we do come back to one another, we bond very strongly.

/r/LongDistance Thread