How fathers can help with the “mental load”

I'm sorry but the list doesn't seem very equitable to me. For example, organizing, soothing baby and pumping seem way more time consuming than all of your tasks together. Maybe it's worth it to revisit the split and account for the time it takes to do things.

Also, no one is born knowing how to differentiate baby clothes. To me is like if my coworker was telling me "yeah I don't know how to use that software that we both got access to at the same time. It seems that you put more effort on learning it so you should continue to be the one using it and I'll just ask you when I need something from it"

I really don't want to sound rude or dismissive. It's amazing that you want to improve. I believe the key information you're looking for is that you need a change of mindset. Think of you both being new at the job and having to delivery for a very demanding boss (baby) in an environment of both win or you both lose. Would you be ok with a coworker that just sits there and ask you to figure it out and he gets paid the same? I would not. Probably neither your wife.

/r/NewParents Thread Parent