Well I'm not an expert on these things, and I'm a guy. Let me tell you a short story. I just visited a small rural church recently. Oh, I'm also single. There were some pretty women at the church, and there were also some tough looking men there. My sense is that a guy might have to win the approval of some of the older men and women at the church, before he should expect to have a chance at one of the pretty young ladies.

So in some places, that kind of protective culture might still take place, where a community takes an interest in helping younger people find what they need.

Outside of that situation, in big urban settings, I think what some women try to do is vet a man before going on too many dates with him. Like come up with a list of criteria you want for a man. And instead of going for immediate gratification and immediate intimacy, try to eliminate guys who do not meet your important criteria, as quickly as possible. That sort of thing.

P.S. Yes, I think forgiveness sometimes works best as a "someday" project, rather than trying to force it to happen immediately.