I think this is why I prefer to stay in love. I’ve done the “it’s better to be angry, because it hurts less than being sad” bit. I’m exhausted and extremely busy with the most high profile job my career has ever had so I can’t be as sad as I would go. So, I remain in love. Driving back from my daughter’s just now I had a good long think about who it is I’m in love with and what she did to me. How pathetically little she must have thought of me to be able to do that. She used to say she was a Love Addict, I’ve been on the LA forum and learned about it and asked questions. None of them did anything even remotely like the torture I was put through.

I was explaining to my therapist before how I would be back with her tomorrow if she would talk with me. All of it has done nothing to dent the hold she has on me.