How to overcome/mute sex-related fears?

With PTSD that’s understandable. It sounds like you have a lovely partner who also understands. It took me a long time to fully get comfortable with my SO. I still feel self-conscious sometimes; strongly related to my in-the-moment feelings about my body. It takes time.

I can’t really help with the guilt and self-disgust. Those feelings linger for me long after being raped and abused. Those feelings take a lot more than just comfort with your partner to work through. For me a lot of the guilt and disgust is with my SO performing oral on me; which my abuser did more than anything for years. I feel gross and pretty sure block enjoyment as much as I can because that feels worse. I allow it I think for self-harm and because he loves it. I’d need some serious intensive consistent professional help to not have those feelings attached to sex (and love).

Maybe you can start, if you’re able to without freezing (I do that, too) with little things: a caress of his body, holding his ass, even just moving against him when he’s thrusting. But don’t beat yourself up if you can’t.

/r/sex Thread