Husbands and Emotional Labor

I don't consider anything you said to be emotional labor nor do I buy into the whole emotional labor thing. That's just part of living and doesn't need its own special term.

If he works more than you I would just do the dishes before they piled up a whole week. And I'd take the trash our myself before I had to remind him.

Some men have this idea that house cleaning is a woman's job, not saying this is your guy. Maybe your husband is contributing in other ways, mowing the lawn, washing and servicing cars.

I have found that I am a better cleaner. I get the baseboards and have a whole routine. My husband gets the pathways clean whereas I go for it all. So when he helps I expect him to do it his way, not mine. I just deal with it.

As for his sense of style, let that go as well unless you want to actually dress him. Some guys just don't care.

My husband watched me go grunge in the 1990s, stood by me after I converted to Islam and went full hijab and abaya in a conservative Christian area. So I can't raise an issue here. Some times you have to let your partner be themselves.

/r/Marriage Thread