First, the struggle to overcome the damage from abuse is normal. We are in so much pain we become targets for people to sell us books and therapy that may or may not help. Everyone’s trauma and their relationship with it is different so what worked for me might not work for you. That said, the method that has worked the best for me overcoming my cptsd is known as the RAIN method which does not require a book or therapist. It mostly just means taking the time to recognize and experience your feelings when they occur. There is a large assumption of privilege here that you have the time to sit for a few minutes when triggered, but it has worked wonders for me.

Regardless, I hope you find some way past this spot in your recovery where you feel stuck. Sometimes I think it is natural and a painful part of healing to go through periods of feeling stuck and regressing.