If sexual experiences were like trading cards what would be your rarest card?

⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐ Card: Littering and.... Littering and.... Experience: In high school, my girlfriend and I got caught by the police having sex in my car parked in a commercial parking lot. I was ticketed for littering because the officer found three used condoms on the ground outside my car door (of course I had planned to pick them up afterwards though). The real kicker though, was that the officer had previously caught me smoking weed once before and drinking another time and he used this opportunity to assume I was holding drugs, so he tore apart my car and ripped out all the panels searching for drugs. When he didn't find anything, her just left everything scattered across the lot, wrote me my littering ticket and then left.

⭐⭐⭐⭐ Card: Backstage access Experience: I was probably no more than 3 months into a new relationship and I took my girlfriend to a very famous electronic artists show in town. She always had a thing for going to the very front near the stage for some reason and so I went up with her during the opener and after about 15 minutes she noticed a Backstage door that was propped open but nobody had gone in or out, so she dragged me in there to go make out. I was a little hesitant but I figured the worse that could happen is we got kicked out. Once we got back there we were making out in the hallway for a few minutes and it just felt too open and public so we snuck off into a side room and one thing let to another and we started having sex. About 5 minutes in, the headliner walked in, made eye contact with me, and says "Oh...don't mind me, I'm just grabbing my gear." And then granted his things and left us. Obviously I didn't stop at that point, and we finished up and proceeded to go enjoy the rest of the show.

⭐⭐⭐ Card: The old swithcheroo Experience: one Saturday night in college, my friend called me up and said he was with a girl but he didn't have anywhere to go and asked if he could bring her over to my place. My apartment was extremely small (2 10x10 bedrooms, a 10x10 kitchen/living room, and a tiny bathroom). I told him I was heading to bed soon but he could come throw on a movie in the living room and crash on the couch. Turns out, he was with two women not just one. I hung out for about 15 minutes, and then explained to everyone I was heading to bed but they were all more than welcome to stay as long as they wanted. As I started walking to my room, one of the girls stopped me and asked if she could come with me, to which I obviously said "of course." She then looked back over at her other friend as if this had all been discussed beforehand and simply said "alright Katie, come with us." Next thing I know, both girls are coming to bed with me while my friend stands there dumbfounded looking at me completely in shock. I couldn't really do anything but shrug my shoulders at that point and take those two fine women to bed with me like they wanted.

⭐⭐ Card: The dance of the darkwads Experience: at burning man, darkwad is a term for people who are not lit up, and therefore putting themselves in danger. It's dark outside and there are thousands of people on bicycles and hundreds of mutant vehicles/art cars just driving around aimlessly, so if you're not well lit up you can very easily just get run over. This story takes place in the middle of the playa, where all the action is going on... People are EVERYWHERE! I'm with some friends and one of them has their younger sister who is experiencing her very first night at her very first burning man. After about 30 minutes she decides she wants to go explore with me, so I check in with her sister and reassure her I will get her home safe by morning. Within 5 minutes of departing from my friends, this girl has stripped naked, laid on the ground in the middle of the playa and is telling me to fuck her. So of course that's exactly what I did, and for about 5 minutes there were art cars going by with hundreds of people watching us and cheering us on. But, I was so distracted by this beautiful naked woman I didn't even think about the fact that we were butt baked and without any lights whatsoever. And a few minutes later a giant art car drives past us within about 10 feet of where we were laying on the ground. Unfortunately, this moment was a bit of a reality shock and we were forced to move ourselves into a safer space.

⭐ Card: My biggest regret Experience: this one will always go down as my greatest sexual fuck up, and I don't know if I'll ever be able to forgive myself for it. It all started on a completely random evening when a girl I went to high school with but hadn't seen or even talked to in probably 5-7 years calls me out of the blue. She's in town modeling for her friends clothing line, and all of her friends have abandoned her, so she's asking me to come meet her at her hotel room. So I grab some booze and I head downtown to go meet her. I get up into her room and we're just casually catching up, nothing crazy, but then her friends call her and they are all at the club. So we got meet up with her friends and they are all models, and all looking absolutely incredible since they were dressed up modeling dresses earlier that evening. Her and her friend proceed to get a little drunk and start dancing on tables and then on me. Next thing I know, her and her friend are hanging on me and taking me back to the hotel. We get back to the hotel and quickly start fooling around. They each get on a side of the bed, they look at me and beckon for me to come crawl in between them. I'm in shock at this point and can't believe this is actually about to happen. I've got one arm around each of them and I start kissing one, and then the other, then I switch back to the other one. We're making out for a solid two, three, shit... Maybe it was even closer to four minutes, I'm not really too sure. But when I turn back over to start kissing the other one, she's passed out cold, completely non responsive. I couldn't believe it, I totally got too distracted with one of them and forgot to keep my attention on both of them and she actually passed out on me! The good news is that the two of us that were still awake ended up having plenty of fun that evening, and there was a little more fun with the other one in the morning as well, but I completely missed the opportunity that they had presented to me and it's really hard not to think about how much fun that could've been had I not been such an idiot!

/r/AskReddit Thread