If I was teleported to 100 bc England, what would happen to me?

They would assume you are.. the Dragonborn of legend!

No. Your presence would raise alarm among the populace until your capture by Catuvellauni warriors. The tribe's name meant something like 'the best warriors', you can assume they were scary dudes or great liars.

They would demand in Celtic you explain yourself and get no answers they would understand, on the plus side you might not be immediately killed as a spy and left face down in a ditch. For one reason.

You don't stink. Your clothes are clean and your body and hands are soft from lack of hard manual work - indicating you are wealthy or possibly a noble of some kind. From your strange finely woven garb and shoes of incredible workmanship they would assume you came from some far land of great craftsmanship.

Confirmed from examining your coinage, with unknown words and a profile assumed to be your monarch, stamped in a detail far beyond any coin they ever saw, and your keys of finest workmanship, all in alloys they had never seen. And some strange slate like object of smooth glass and other strange material, they have no idea at all about what the hell it is.

I'd recommend not turning the android phone, you would be executed on the spot for open sorcery. (HARHAR! baboomtish)

Possibly they would take you to be a survivor from a trader shipwreck. So maybe your pasty ass is worth something.

You would be hauled in front of a local tribal lord, duly impressed with this odd captive he might take you to the king to find what is to be done with you. They would wish to figure out if you were worth ransom to your people.

Court scholars and other advisors, would examine your belongings, look surprised and confused and point at a map on vellum, asking where the hell you are from.

You'd need to think fast because a wave of the hand will see you with a spear through your chest and your corpse stripped and thrown on a garbage pile if the boss man loses patience. Then the king might be wearing your dope ass shoes. All your other shit would be melted down, and your clothing given to women who would marvel at the close weave and make something high status from it but more the local fashion.

tl;dr Obviously that is just my take on it, who knows how it would go. Shit if you had practical skills you could end up a lord or something. Still chuckling I got to do the FOSS joke.

/r/history Thread