3. If you have trouble talking to women, picture how they would look fat. Because i...

If you have trouble talking to women, picture how they would look fat. Because if your marry them, that's how they'll probably end up.

I was into this girl a long time ago and we both hit it off, she was super cute but her mom was even cuter. After a couple of months of dating I was totally in love with this girl and contemplated proposing knowing that she was gonna stay hot forever. I finally did and she said yes, but first she had to tell me something that she neglected to tell me before. She explained how she was adopted as a baby and didn't know or want to search for her birth mother since she thought of her adopted parents as being her only parents and heard stories that her real mom was a drug addict and prostitute.

I freaked the fuck out knowing the whole reason I wanted to marry this girl was to bang a hot chick for the rest of my life. I went into panic mode not knowing what this girl was gonna grow up to become which led me to convince my fiance that she should search out her real mother. We sold off some of her jewelry then hired a lawyer to find her mom, took almost 3 months to locate her almost 1000 miles away in southern Florida.

A month later we finally booked a trip and flew down to Florida to see her mom for the first time. She didn't know we were coming and she was staying at a motel in a rundown part of town. We knocked on the door for 5 minutes before this skeleton of a person with sores and bruises covering their body answered the door. We told her who we were, but she didn't care at all about my fiance and asked us if we had any money she could have.

I knew it right then and there this girl I promised to marry was going to turn up just like her biological mother, so I did the only thing I could think of and swiped the drugs sitting on the table in the motel room. Before we were about to leave Florida I took the drugs I swiped and planted them in the fiance's carry-on. When we reached the airport I told my fiance I was going to use the restroom, but instead I alerted TSA about a suspicious woman that offered to sell me drugs and then pointed to my fiance. It only took a few seconds before they found the drugs, then they took my fiance away and I flew back home. She was convicted of a felony and was sentenced to 2 years in in prison where she picked up a drug addiction to cocaine and heroin. When she got out she had no money and resorted to prostitution to pay for her drug habit.

So the moral of the story is that woman really do grow up to be like their mothers.

/r/Showerthoughts Thread
Previous
Next

Recently removed from /r/Showerthoughts

Mathematics are confusing because of the language, not the concepts Lesbian porn in gay porn too but somehow everyone forgets it and just instantly thinks of men. We'll have true gender equality when a woman, who works in a traditionally male job, will be able to be utterly useless at her job without getting fired. It's a weird part of human evolution that eating healthy vegetables is seen as a punishment and a sugary dessert is a reward The real gauge of friendship is how clean your house needs to be before they can come over. The truth is that money does solve almost all of our problems Parenting is a toxic relationship where you try to be loving to a tiny human that screams/bites/hits you. You never see old people laying/sleeping on their stomach We used to get big yellow books delivered to our houses that doxed everyone in town. The object of golf is to play the least amount of golf possible 1000 Terabyte hard drives full of data, weigh the same as 1000 Terabyte hard drives with no data. The fact that Google auto completes all of our sentences is a reminder of how unoriginal our problems are. Dementia is going to wreak havoc on generations that rely on technology that is heavily password protected (bank accounts, social media, email, etc). Two factor authentication and password recovery questions will make it all the more difficult Mermaids can definitely be black. Africa is surrounded by water too. Considering how short our ancestors' lives were, most of humanity's greatest inventions must be been made by young people

More Random Comments

Got this Smith Corona Galaxie Deluxe for $40 on FB marketplace for my partner for Christmas. The person I got it from put so much WD40 in it that it leaked into the case and is still seeping after I wiped a lot out of many crevices. Thoughts on cleaning it out? When you and a man start going on dates, what makes you decide you want to sleep with him? I'm getting mixed signals from him and me and my anxiety need some help with perspective. Did he steal my v card and is now played me? Redditors who have hired a private investigator...what did you find out? Tech Support and Basic Questions Thread - November 30, 2020 Redditors who have hired a private investigator...what did you find out? Erin O’Toole must stop pandering to the worst in the Conservative party RV Park Design / Feedback OTPs, exes, and double standards Can DMT help me process traumatic events? Multiple names Who likes Germany? (2019 poll PEW research center) My paranormal experiences that changed my life. What do you want for Christmas?