I'm [22/F] and I feel like, because of who/what I am, I won't ever have a real relationship?

The only good advice you will get here is that you need therapy. The snap thing comes from deep within and is probably caused by your own insecurity and ego. This is usually something that people can't/wont recognize themselves, but a therapist can greatly help with. Almost every time we lash out at someone, it isn't them, it's us. As far as the asexuality, you are right, not many people will want to date you. That doesn't mean that no one will date you. There are asexuals out there much like yourself. Once you get some therapy for your issues, you should think about finding other asexuals or low sex drive individuals to hang out with. Maybe start your own group where you live or online.

First things first. Get some professional help. You will likely learn things about yourself that you've been in denial about for a long time, so it's hard. You will likely learn that you have deeper issues with yourself that are causing you to turn on people close to you. Facing these issues can truly help, but like I said, it's going to be hard. Also, you have to do your best to have integrity when dealing with the truth of your situation.

That being said, I will give you my honest 2 cents. People who tend to categorize themselves in a way that puts people off, or denies them access to intimacy, generally don't like themselves and sort of project that out to the world at large. Both your asexuality and your action of turning on those close to you, are essentially linked and most likely stem from a deeper problem where you are not satisfied with yourself, your looks, your attitude, your success/failures in life, your weaknesses, your fears or perhaps just one of these, but in a really intense way. We all have issues with all of these things, but we usually don't turn on ourselves.

It's a tough struggle to love yourself, when you are the keeper of all your own secrets.

The internet will tell you that being asexual is a sexual preference like being gay or straight, but it isn't. They will encourage you that it's totally cool and unique to be asexual, and that might make you feel good in the short term. But you need to face the hard truth about life, love, intimacy, and why you wont allow yourself to have these things. I wish you the best of luck and I hope my words have even a bit of truth to them.

/r/relationships Thread