Well I consulted a sheik at my mosque and he hit me with a flat expiation, my searches on the internet sheiks didn't have my situation exactly but most of them come close to "the oath still isn't broken but most not happen again and must do tawba not expiation", I didn't explain much to him as I'm super embarrassed to explain it so he jumped to the conclusion that I did it, doesn't matter how so I must expiate, he said there's no such thing as "doing it by mistake or being oblivous about the action as long as I knew it was a possibility" yes I had the idea that it could happen but didn't exactly know that It could happen in such way, now I feel like garbage and confused because of the doubts, I think I should expiate now