I've had 4 decades to try to figure that answer out, and I'm still not sure what the answer is. Basicly I'm a bisexual male. I've been married for 20 years and am now divorced. I love crossdressing but I'm not passable. I do wear panties, bra, etc under my street clothes a lot. No one would ever guess that I'm anything but straight in daily life.
I've had and have a fantastic career and that would have been denied to me if I appeared to be anything but straight. In private I like sex with men and women and sometimes both. Would love to be penetrating a woman while a guy is deep in me! I love doing oral with women and men. And I love playing dress up with cute crossdressers (my preferred term). When I was younger I loved a sexy weekend with a girlfriend where we would have sex 10-12 times, watch good movies, eat nice meals, and not much else for 48 hours!
The issue of labelling has become a big deal in recent years. I simply don't know what all the labels now in use mean. And I don't know which of them apply except it might be most accurate to say I'm bisexual with a crossdressing fetish. I can say I'm not interested in gay men who cultivate an ultra masculine look though I do have sex with gay men.
I sometimes go to a local club which attracts men and women of all genders. You can check out their website at aquariusbath.org . It attracts a lot of MF couples and swing clubs on the weekend. At slower times it tends to have more of a gay clientele.
I think that if I were a young person today I might find issues relating to sexually much more complicated than they were for me in the 70's. I figured out early on that I was bisexual and for some reason I assumed most people were and are bisexual to some extent. Being the brainy nerd type, I was pretty much out of the social mainstream until I got to university and from that I just knew that the less others knew about my private life the better.
The result is that today I'm happy with who I am, I have very close knit family ties, some good friends who know nothing about my sex life, a great career and apart from a mid career episode of depression brought on by work stress, I've had a terrific life.
PS; Right now we have an issue in the local news about a transgender student who is 14 whose parents are upset that the student is not being allowed to share a hotel room with a person of the same gender as the child identifies with. The school thought the smart thing would be to give the transgender student their own room. This upset the parents hugely because their child was being excluded from the experience of sharing a room with a classmate on a school trip.
Today, I look at that and think that if that happened to me at the age of 14, even in this era, my life would have been tormented and miserable.