Again, thank you for taking time out of your day to reply to a random stranger on the internet. That alone means something to me.

And you're right, there is so much going through my head which I covered here in posts on my other throwaways but I won't go into detail here.

Thing is, I do live at home, my parents are divorced but I see my mom every night, and talk to my grandma regularly. I got a job in order to save up for the tens of thousands of college debt I already have, and the number of that debt will continue to skyrocket as my educational career goes on.

And honestly, I would rather never have a wife or children, if I do make it out of this rut without jumping off a building, and somehow become successful, I would rather not have to deal with whiny brats and be divorce-raped however cynical that may sound

Also I fully understand how young I am, I just cannot fathom the idea that life could possibly get any better. If I graduate college I'll be stuck with a shitty 9-5 with overtime and douchebag bosses, wishing I would've killed myself earlier.

Also, although sure phones are replaceable I have 51 cents to my name (not counting the 10s of thousands of debt)

Before I landed this shitty job I applied to countless other minimum wage jobs, before getting lucky with this one as they are building a new store, hopefully they will forgive me since they sent me to a location farther away while the new store -which is much closer to my home- was being built.

I've been thinking of picking up a hobby, reading sounds great, PM me any book recommendations. However, at this point in time I would rather have the least human contact as possible, I'm just not in a very great mood.

Again thank you for your kindness