I'm 38 and have been single most of my life. In the past all of my boyfriends were mediocre and the most recent at 36 was a great guy on paper. Dating someone good on paper who was 38 and at that age has taught me two truths 1. The past doesn't matter 2. Men don't care about age, look at Jeff Bezos.
Once I dumped him I realized that the love I was searching for didn't seem to exist and now I was old and had no career to show for because my attention was focused on men. Now men are literally the bottom of my list. I want to have a career, great friendships, money and property. I have to earn enough to buy my own home and pay for my own vacations.

I'm an American and my goal is to move to Canada so that too trumps love. I don't want to give up entirely but I look back and I was such a pick me, I was taken advantage of so often. I felt so much pressure to be beautiful and thin for losers who didn't try for me. It's left me disappointed and I'm trying not to become bitter but being nearly 40 I want to focus on things within my control and I haven't had good luck with men. Most of my friends are dating losers, one friend divorced and met her now husband in her 40's so there's hope but its a low priority. When I do date again I'll bring my A game and keep a roster.