Objectively, yes. I could explain procedures, but not feelings. Not subjective things. IE, what does it feel like to wear a binder for the first time, what does dysphoria feel like, etc.
The truth is, is I don't know those things. Not like a trans guy would. I would bargain that the chances are much higher than I'm just some anorectic with body dysmorphia and without that, I'd be well off enough. The statistics would agree with me. So whereas wearing a binder was an immediate relief because I looked thinner and right in a way, I wouldn't guarantee it was for the same reasons as a trans guy. That anorectic women and trans guys have the same end objective of getting rid of breasts is not coincidental, both idealise the same end result, but for vastly different reasons. One is dysphoria and one is dysmorphia and I have no idea how to distinguish these things. I've been anorectic far, far longer than identifying trans (and both times I've fought anorexia in hard mode, has ended with me thinking I'm trans. The difference between the first time and this time, is that last time I was alleviated of anorexia and gained 20 lbs immediately after 'figuring it out' because 'fuck it I'm gonna drink Mountain Dew and eat shitty like a guy'. This time, I've stuck at 17.5 BMI like a housecat to the edge of water so I can tip back off whenever I want. That's not healthy at all and I know it, but it's literally the only thing I have right now, the comfort that I can jump back off the cliff whenever I want and proceed, and I've already begun that slow descent into the madness. That's not healthy, again, but it's all I know to rely on right now). As someone who has both conditions (?? I think?) and is a 28F, I CANNOT explain to someone what wearing a binder 'feels like' when it comes to the mental process. For me, it was relief that I no longer look so... bulky, high body fat. For most trans guys, I doubt they look at it the same. That said, there will forever be exceptions, and I imagine it all comes down to 'are they the trans guy who got as skinny as possible to avoid looking feminine and fixated on weight as a cure all or not?'.
Basically, both times I have 'realised I'm trans', it has alleviated my anorectic behaviours to a degree. The first time was relatively completely for months, before on and off starvation cycles until I got smart enough to learn how to 'do anorexia right', which is when it's become a real monster. The day I learnt TDEE/BMR was the day it took off, that I figured out you can feasibly eat 350 kcal in a day and not starve... well anyway. I wasn't as plagued by food thoughts over the past ~2 months, but I never gained weight, either, despite freeing myself from calorie cou--why am I on this tangent, it's pretty fucking irrelevant, isn't it? LOL
Anyway, sure, I can jump at the facts and figures. I can still fight from a completely objective stand point for the rest of you. But I no longer feel safe in explaining 'what is gender dysphoria' to a cisgender person because I no longer feel safe in that I know what that is. I can try, but the likelihood is I've never actually felt it, but what I felt was some kind of other dysphoria or bothered feeling, unrelated to gender in its entirety. And yeah, I feel bad for jumping right in instead of thinking things over 289329382 times. This shit is still 80% of my mental capacity. I've been unable to think straight since seven months ago, but not entirely because of gender. That's only been the past three months or so.
I don't feel I'm any sort of authority on the mental/feeling aspect, and I do apologise for jumping right in. Because my doubts (strengthened more as time goes) could be right. It is likely just BDD. Which I don't care to seek mental health care for when there's an easier, free solution.
And there are just too many factors into this equation that make me feel like I can definitively say that A, B or C is gender dysphoria and not some other deep-rooted factor. I figure I'll find out when I get thinner, I figure it'll hit me later on down the road of what it could be. And although going to a therapist would probably make this a lot faster of a process, I can't get on T anytime soon anyway, I can't really start anything, anyway, because I a) already don't fit into men's clothing at all, so wardrobe transition is impossible and b) the other factors that pertain to other trans guys' journey aren't of any fucking interest (ie, cutting my hair) to me.
And as for every other 'what if' and 'imagine yourself as'... I can't. I just can't. I don't know if I'll be pleased with my voice later, or if I'll forever hear it as this high-pitched (but not) in my head, I can't know if I'll like any of the changes, because when I think of actually changing, I just feel like I'm wearing a different mask than the one I'm already wearing. I don't know how much of it is dysmorphia versus dysphoria, period. Everyone tells me my voice is already deep (I don't hear that), they say I already have a masculine silhouette with a binder on (I see 18% bodyfat), they already think I'm androgynous (lolno). It's a fucking clusterfuck, which is mainly why I've given up on it entirely. I don't see myself living past 36 either way. I don't expect to see myself living past 25 once I realise that the adult world outside of college isn't as glamorous as I expected. It doesn't matter if that comes with SRS or not--I don't see myself living into any really late years. I don't see myself being old. I have zero desire to.
I can pretend I'll be happier and less anxious and less depressed on T. The truth is, is I have no fucking idea if that's the case and I'm goddamn terrified of making the wrong choice and not being able to go back to a 'very pretty girl' and having to trudge forward because I already fucked up my voice and vag and face and shit. It's one or the other: hot dude or pretty chick with flawless genitalia, being stuck in some gender limbo is my fucking nightmare. There's nothing wrong with detransition, ever, but the idea of the side effects of it all is a living hell to me. I'm vain, I'm greedy and if I'm not a perfect replica of whatever gender I decide on (physically), I'll not be able to live. One way is free (in every way, considering not buying food has no cost) where I can probably shove everything down and get somewhat intimate, the other way is $200k+ before I can even function around another human being within an arm's reach without cringing in horror and breaking down.
...
I guess I spilt everything, but I guess this is all why I'm having problems. There's a LOT more to it. I don't really want to go into that 'lot more'. This scratches the surface's 50th coat of fucking varnish. Maybe the 49th, too. Logically, though, I'm pretty sure I'm not likely a statistical anomaly, and the higher rate of 'right' is probably anorexia and a slice of BDD and some other stupid shit.