To address the first point, I know exactly what you mean.

When I used to hear advertisements for prescription drugs on TV, and one of the side effects that were listed was "reduced libido", I'd think "so what? You'd want sex less. More time for other things."

What they don't tell you is that reduced libido can mean you want sex less and wish you wanted it more. It's not just "oh, I don't like sex anymore. What's on TV?". It's more like "oh, I really want to get in the mood but I just can't seem to do it".

My girlfriend, who is cis, has a much higher sex drive than I do. It comes with its own challenges. We ended up figuring out that she enjoys being the penetrative partner, and even if I'm not in the mood for sex I generally always enjoy being held and feeling close to her. So, it works, but occasionally I wish I could just get super horny like she does and go wild over it.

I suspect that progesterone is a component here. Cis women have it, and it fluctuates with their cycle. And, wouldn't you know it, it tends to be highest when they're most fertile. See the connection?

I've heard that the best time to introduce progesterone is in the third year of HRT. That's when a cis girl's body starts producing it (third year of puberty). I have heard from one person in particular that adding progesterone in during the third year drastically accelerated her feminization and helped with her sex drive too.

At any rate, yeah it kinda sucks, but then again so does being trans most of the time. I find that if you want to get in the mood, you really have to take your time and "set the stage". I need at least 20 minutes of foreplay generally before I even get turned on enough to start thinking about sex and getting into the moment. It's worth noting, too, that a lot of cis women are similar. I do think that trans women on the whole have a lower libido than cis women. That could be due to AAs, it could be due to brain differences, I'm not sure.