I'm very sexual, but i can't have a sexual life and it's making me suicidal. Is there a way to become assexual?

OP it sounds like you're trying to avoid upsetting a future sexual partner you've concocted, by replacing them with an asexual partner. I can't say I speak for all asexuals, but I can speak for myself in noting one fear is not being good enough for a partner. A sexual partner having sexual needs, is naturally going to enact them somehow (physically, mentally), and if your asexual partner can accept this, you'll be fine, but I personally would feel it's a direct reflection on me and my inabilities. I would feel bad.

Sounds like I'm retiring you to a bed between a rock and a hard place, but rather I'd like to offer you some hope and sound advice. Firstly, we can't control other people. Even the best lovers, and human beings are cheated upon, left and lose loved ones. Let this liberate you from the fear that you won't be good enough, because this doesn't exist as a tangible concept. In the same way that you don't exist to be someone's perfect. When you enter a relationship you ought think about what you are learning from it, and develop in it, rather than just trying to maintain a stable perfection.

You need to learn to love what you have to offer, and cultivate what you aren't extensively capable in yet. I know it's a scary thought opening yourself up to rejection or damage on a basis as superficial as sex, but think less that you're losing partners, and think more on what you've gained each time.

I personally don't see much value in romantic/sexual relationships, as much as for example friendships. I just wanted to add my 2 cents that if you choose someone based on your fears and insecurities, you will never properly approach these issues. To enter a relationship truthfully, you need to see value in yourself and understand yourself, not completely deny a side of yourself. It usually comes back to hurt either you or your partner.

Nonetheless, I can promise you'll be okay.

/r/Asexual Thread