We're kinda feeling things out as we go along.
I guess to backtrack a bit about what I meant earlier. Thinking back to trends in our relationship, I was a lot more forward with him than I've ever been with anyone. Before I met him, I basically spent two years crushing on a good friend hoping he'd ask me out, and I never so much as flirted because I wasn't "the type of girl to make the first move." When I met my husband, suddenly the need for the guy to make a move wasn't so important as much as GETTING HIM, I was so freakin' attracted to him I would make a fool of myself if I had to, to have a chance. I thought he was soooooo out of my league when I first saw him I basically hightailed it in the other direction, until the second time we ran into each other and I realized he was part of my circle of friends. And then I started getting to know him and he was this awesome person.
Anyway, I asked him out on our first date. In terms of physical intimacy I think he held out for a while waiting for me, and I basically had to tell him point blank after a few months, "I'm ready to move this relationship to the next level." He didn't propose to me, and I didn't quite propose to him, but the talks of us getting married was kind of initiated by me when I let him know I'd be happier to elope than spend gobs of money on a wedding. Heck, even in terms of our dead/dying bedroom he really held back and waited for me to take charge of things. In terms of kink, he's been into ballbusting for some time and pretty early on (before we were married) it became something of a regular thing for us. On that basis alone I tend to think he trends more sub than dom, though we never quite brought it to a femdom place either.
A while ago, we were talking over in the other sub about "Mr/Mrs Rogers" and there was that long discussion about dominance and what that means. In a more recent discussion this week someone hit the nail on the head that it's not so much about force but attitude, the "I'm so into you I can barely hold myself back" sort of passion that's not necessarily coming from an "I own you, you serve me" sort of place.
Like I said, we're slowly figuring things out. I've secretly been into ropes and other kinky things in terms of fantasy, and we're dipping our toes into the greater world of bdsm. We had a conversation last week about him tying me up, and basically it came to light that he'd like to incorporate some rope play for him too. We both like being on the receiving end, we both like losing a bit of control and giving it up to each other, and we both like giving each other pleasure. In fact, I think dominance is probably the wrong term for it, because what we're into is really less about power play per se. Neither of us wants to be furniture for the other, be led around on all fours by a leash, wish to call the other "Master/Mistress," neither wants to be trained or punished and neither wants to do the training or punishment. But we enjoy mild pain/impact play, ceding control of the situation, and being the "receiver" of the other's attentions.
I'm not sure if that answers your question...