Personally I had planned on replacing my 8+ with an XS but I was really disappointed in the battery life. The XS Max was just as big or bigger than my 8+ and the size was one of the main reasons I wanted to get out of my 8+ in the first place
Hadn't even considered the XR, but when I saw it in person I realized that it was a fair bit smaller than my 8+. Then I found out the battery life was even better than my 8+.
I had to decide which I valued more. The size and battery life I wanted, or having an OLED screen, optical zoom and an extra GB of RAM.
I stared at the screens and played with both phones for an hour and decided the screen and camera were less important to me. The fact that I saved $250 was a nice fringe benefit and I like the fact that I don't have to worry about burn-in being a potential problem.
If Apple ever finds a way to give the smaller XS equivalent the same battery life as the XR, then that may be my next phone. But FWIW this is my favorite iPhone I've owned yet. Really pleased with it.