Hey, thanks for your input. I'd say my dad is the main one in the equation here- he has a domineering personality, and often has raging temper tantrums at me for very menial things. For example a few days ago, in our house we have two doors; an outer door with a lock and an inner door that we shut to stop the dog getting the mail. I forgot to lock the inner door, and my dad screamed at me for several minutes, and just got angrier and started swearing when I calmly asked him to stop shouting.

This sort of thing happens on average, twice a week but can happen almost every day when he has his low periods. When I was around 14, he was in some financial difficulty and definitely took his stress out on me. I feel like that genuinely traumatised me to this day, as his actions towards me were bordering on (if not complete) verbal abuse. My current boyfriend hates him based on everything I've told him, and thinks he's abusive but I have a lot of trouble accepting that.

Inbetween his rages, he's the kindest most supportive guy you could ever meet and again, he's bought me so much and given me so many opportunities in life that I feel overcome with guilt even when I tell my boyfriend about an argument that we'd had. Once, he got so angry that I told him I'd call the police if he hit me, and he responded by knocking my phone out of my hand. I told my boyfriend about it, and ended up feeling guilty for weeks.

The guilt is the main problem here. When he's calm, he's an amazing father but he descends into a monster too often.