Janitors of Reddit, what is the most WTF you've ever had to deal with?

Not a janitor but worked as a bus boy long enough for some stories and you can guess that who had to clean it came down to a game of rock paper scissors:

  1. This guy tries to bring his dog inside the restaurant and obviously say no unless it is a helper dog. It was slow so the manager said he could eat on the patio with no issues. When the guy left there was a line of shit about 12 feet long down the patio from the dog having explosive diarrhea and then just walking and shitting down the patio. -Didn't have to clean this one

  2. Old guy in a bathroom asks another dinner guest in the bathroom for help. Well the guest comes out gagging and says the old guy shit everywhere in the bathroom and can't get his pants back on. This guy managed to get shit on the floor, smeared across the stalls, and a large chunky stuck to the ceiling. Co-worker helped him put his pants on and clean up. -Didn't have to clean this one up

  3. I watch this little black kid maybe like 10-12 years old destroy a full order of cheese fries to himself... It was pretty impressive because I had a hard time doing this as a 18 year old. I bet the co-worker $10 he would vomit and 5 seconds after the bet was accepted. The little boy stands up, turns and faces the entire floor and vomits a gigantic pile of foamy, goo-y, cheese fries. -I had to clean this one up

  4. Was working at a bar for this one - This woman got white girl wasted and passed out in the bathroom. We didn't have a female working that night so the bar back is elected to go help this lady. (Yup, that's me). Welp, this is what I walked into and I remember it quite vividly... This lady is passed out, head resting on the toilet seat, covered in vomit (she drank something that was very red and sticky like strawberry fanta), she clearly shit herself while on all 4's vomiting because there is a small trail of shit from the center to a small pile of shit at her ass. Just to top it all off becuase fuck me right? It was her time of the month and she apparently did not have a tampon in. It was a shitty murder scene if I had ever seen one. -Ya I helped her and got covered and bodily fluids but did not have to clean the bathroom.

  5. This cute ass old couple comes in and asks for a large booth. Sure, np, whatever 2 people in a 6 top. They eat and are out of this place in like 30-45 mins but dear god. This old ladies vagina must have died, rotted, slightly healed, gotten infected, died again, raised as an undead, then killed again and dragged through 1,000 rotting corpses. Visually nothing was wrong with the booth but the cushion smelt so bad that it was effecting other tables. I sprayed this thing with lysol, took it out back and scrubbed it in hot soapy water, let it bake in 115F heat for a day, after 3 days this thing still stunk.

/r/AskReddit Thread