I think a lot of it spawned from a conversation we had yesterday.

We went to a party on Saturday at one of my aforementioned "friends" house. This is a person that I've loved for years. 19 years, I think. I became established in my career when he was in his freshman year at college. Now, he's doing very well for himself and his family and I'm terribly happy for him but I'm also terribly jealous of his success.

Yesterday (Sunday) my father told me that he bought a new RV. Good for him and all, but that triggered my wife into being sad because she felt like that money could have been better spent to improve our situation. (That's a-whole-nother can of worms but, the point is yes we've discussed it.) So I had to play clean up yesterday and tell her about all the things we should be happy about. (Love, family, roof, food, etc.)

I think my biggest problem may be that I can't believe this is all there is. Mon - Fri I get up and go to work. I come home. I go to bed. I get up and do it again. I feel like I should be more satisfied with life. Is that selfish?

Thank you for your response, BTW Sorry that I'm ranting.