Thank you so much for your kind words, it's not offensive at all.

I just have always had problems making friends ever since i was little and I'm almost 30 now. Even now at my work placement I feel nobody wants me around, they become quiet or ignore what I say or even avoid having lunch with me. I don't know, maybe my voice is too loud? I say offensive things? I get weird and at a loss for words to talk to people about. Maybe I'm just boring? There's nothing more than anything that I want is to make friends to do things I enjoy: like go out and just do nerdy things (but people that are into that are all in their early 20's and act like teenagers and it's very cringy to me , as I enjoy nerdy things but don't go overboard with it.)

​

I just don't know, I talk to my fiance and I feel like he gets angry or I get on his nerves with things like this because he's working so much and I have had talks before with him and nothing has changed. I feel like I'm at the point : Why bother? He says he loves me but if he doesn't want to hug me or kiss me on his own accord, that I always have to hug him and kiss him, why should I force him to do things he doesn't want to do?

​

But this makes me even more upset: at this point people would just say :"break up with him". I have nobody else at all, no friends or family here. I wouldn't have enough money to stay anywhere else and I have so many things and my pet cat...and I love him still so much and this is all just so upsetting!