Kailyn&Javi dealing with isaac's future visitation with javi

I think my parents divorcing was the best thing for them in the long run. They are both now remarried, much happier and they were fucking miserable together & fought all the time. They actually first started dating in 7th grade & were together until they were like idk late 30's? I think the way they handled it fucked me up.

First of all it wasn't just the divorce. I was an only child - very spoiled. I never had to learn how to make friends because I literally grew up with the other kids as babies in daycare & we aged together into school. Then one day my parents announced that we were moving across the country & spun it like it was going to be this huge great adventure. What they didn't tell me was that we were moving because they were about to divorce and THEY grew up in the state we were moving to so my extended family was there (who I was not close to as I didn't see them much) but obviously my parents wanted support.

My dad completely checked out. He had severe anger issues & my mom had been hounding him for years to go to therapy in which he refused. Only when it was "too late" and my mom decided she was done was when he started begging her to give him another chance. I witnessed many nights of my dad crying and screaming about how he loved my mom & wanted to go to therapy and my mom straight up acting like a cunt and just brushing him off.

Now as an adult I can see they were BOTH in the wrong. But at the time I was just a kid, didn't understand and just saw my mom being a bitch and making my dad cry so obviously I took my dad's side.

My dad was extremely depressed and I started the 50/50 thing but my dad would be too depressed to come pick me up and mainly spent time with his family and left me at my moms (who I blamed for all of this so hated) Like I said, I had gone to the same private school literally my entire life and was then thrown into a public school mid year in 5th grade....where I didn't even have any friends & my parents were too consumed in their own drama/shit to make sure I was alright. Which I wasn't.

Also I guess what really set me off was that we always had a really good family friend back in my home state who worked with my mom. He would babysit me often and because his family lived on the west coast he attended many of our family holiday's because he had no one. Well guess now who is my stepdad and father to my only 13 year old younger half sib?

I was told by my parents that I shouldn't be upset over the divorce and that my feelings were wrong. That was soooo fucked up of them because you cannot help what you are feeling! I needed help processing all the change & emotions that I was going through and instead I was a latch key kid who barely even saw my parents anymore & now didn't even have any friends.

I also obviously felt extremely betrayed by my "babysitter/friend" who moved in with my mom less then a year later. I was used to seeing him at the dinner table with BOTH my parents...not him coming out of my mom's room in the morning.

It just got worse from there. As soon as my half sister was born I was sent away to a residential treatment center where I grew up until I turned 18. I barely talk to my mother & I haven't seen my little sister in years...my mom refuses to admit that any of my emotional problems had anything to do with all of this. I cannot blame all of my behavior of them obviously but saying it had nothing to do with it?

Luckily while I was in the RTC my dad got some serious help and changed. We have a very close relationship now and he feels extremely guilty about his past behavior and how it affected me. My mom has never once done anything wrong apparently (I kinda see Kail in her actually)

Would it have been different if my parents had divorced but we didn't move states? Probably. I just went through a lot of change in a short amount of time with literally zero support.

I still think it was very selfish of my parents for all of that. And I am now a grown ass adult who still struggles emotionally with depression, anxiety & a severe addiction.

As a kid I never had any of these problems and was labeled as "gifted"

Nobody would have ever guessed the kid I was turned out to be the person I am now. Whenever I look at old pictures it makes me really fucking sad because you can clearly see where I can go from happy & loving life to not...and at such a young age. I was always more sensitive then other kids (Diagnosed with borderline now lol) & idk...when I look back I can clearly pin point exactly where my life took a turn for the worse :(

/r/teenmom Thread Parent