I posted this once before, but the thread never got much notice, so I'm doing a copy/paste. This is one of my favorite work stories, and I enjoy telling it.
I work night shift in a gas station/convenience store. One night this dude came in, came right up to the counter and asked for Marlboro reds. The door was right by the counter, so I had barely had time to see him when he came in. I saw nothing out of the ordinary right away. He's a kinda dark complected hispanic guy, maybe about 5'4", wearing a flannel jacket. As I set his cigs on the counter I see the shirt he's wearing under the jacket--a red crop top with D cups underneath. I'm thinking "okay, that's interesting" because I'm a pretty open minded sort. But I had to see what bottoms he'd paired with the crop top, so as he left, I leaned over the counter to see. His jacket came to about the middle of his ass and underneath it was nothing but shoes. I couldn't stop laughing about it for the rest of the night. I told one of my regular police officers about it and he asked if I wanted to file a complaint. I told him I wouldn't bother since I didn't know anything about the little half-naked dude anyway. So fast forward to the following week. He comes in again, straight up to the counter, but without a jacket on today. He's wearing a red tank top and earrings and red lipstick, all I can see over the top of the counter where his bottom's were was some white lace. Once again I give him his cigs, once again I look after him as he goes, and dude has basically a doily around his waist. Completely sheer, only covers about half his ass. So I'm thinking I'm going to be clever and grab a cigarette and follow him out as though I'm just taking a break, and I'll get his license plate number. No sooner did I light my cigarette when he turns around and asks me for a light. I'm not kidding when I describe his "skirt" as a doily. It looked like a crocheted grandma's-end-table doily. And there was his dick, completely visible and actually hanging out a little from underneath the doily, because the doily was just that insubstantial. I lock eyes with him to keep from accidentally looking down again and light his cigarette for him and he turns and goes. I told my regular officer about it and he was able to find out a little about him, but I had already decided not to file a report myself. He wound up becoming a semi-regular customer for a couple years and his appearance never ceased to cause me vast amounts of mirth. Things like this are what keep me working this job...people never cease to surprise and amuse me in new and strange ways.